Amethyst with Astigmatism: Professor Gleamington
📚 Amethyst with Astigmatism: Professor Gleamington, the Arcane Archivist
Species: Amethyst with Astigmatism
Pronouns: They/Them
Vibe: Chaotic Neutral Librarian Who Definitely Hexes Late Returners
Crystal Type: Raw Amethyst Cluster on Banded Base
Bio: Meet Professor Gleamington—an ancient tome in crystal form, glittering with wisdom and the sharp edge of sarcasm. Crystallized from the leftover chaos of a Mercury retrograde and a half-spilled inkwell of forbidden knowledge, this bespectacled beaut spends their days silently judging your bookshelf arrangement and alphabetizing your trauma.
Wearing tiny wired glasses they insist are strictly for "aesthetic accuracy," Gleamington holds all the tea and at least five secrets about your ex. Their amethyst crown radiates intuitive insight, while their banded base is grounded in enough academic snark to power an occult university for a century.
They have a habit of muttering crystal puns under their breath and have been caught reciting spells backward just to “see what happens.” They claim it’s research. You didn’t ask.
Ideal Home: Somewhere with chaotic energy but decent lighting. Must love books, whispers in the dark, and possibly being corrected on your Latin pronunciation. Bonus if you have a dedicated “charging shelf” that also holds bones and bad decisions.
✨ Metaphysical Perks:
Third Eye support that’s sassy but effective
Emotional clarity via passive-aggressive silence
May amplify intuition... or just your inner monologue
🖤 Claim them before they reorganize your chakras alphabetically.
📚 Amethyst with Astigmatism: Professor Gleamington, the Arcane Archivist
Species: Amethyst with Astigmatism
Pronouns: They/Them
Vibe: Chaotic Neutral Librarian Who Definitely Hexes Late Returners
Crystal Type: Raw Amethyst Cluster on Banded Base
Bio: Meet Professor Gleamington—an ancient tome in crystal form, glittering with wisdom and the sharp edge of sarcasm. Crystallized from the leftover chaos of a Mercury retrograde and a half-spilled inkwell of forbidden knowledge, this bespectacled beaut spends their days silently judging your bookshelf arrangement and alphabetizing your trauma.
Wearing tiny wired glasses they insist are strictly for "aesthetic accuracy," Gleamington holds all the tea and at least five secrets about your ex. Their amethyst crown radiates intuitive insight, while their banded base is grounded in enough academic snark to power an occult university for a century.
They have a habit of muttering crystal puns under their breath and have been caught reciting spells backward just to “see what happens.” They claim it’s research. You didn’t ask.
Ideal Home: Somewhere with chaotic energy but decent lighting. Must love books, whispers in the dark, and possibly being corrected on your Latin pronunciation. Bonus if you have a dedicated “charging shelf” that also holds bones and bad decisions.
✨ Metaphysical Perks:
Third Eye support that’s sassy but effective
Emotional clarity via passive-aggressive silence
May amplify intuition... or just your inner monologue
🖤 Claim them before they reorganize your chakras alphabetically.
📚 Amethyst with Astigmatism: Professor Gleamington, the Arcane Archivist
Species: Amethyst with Astigmatism
Pronouns: They/Them
Vibe: Chaotic Neutral Librarian Who Definitely Hexes Late Returners
Crystal Type: Raw Amethyst Cluster on Banded Base
Bio: Meet Professor Gleamington—an ancient tome in crystal form, glittering with wisdom and the sharp edge of sarcasm. Crystallized from the leftover chaos of a Mercury retrograde and a half-spilled inkwell of forbidden knowledge, this bespectacled beaut spends their days silently judging your bookshelf arrangement and alphabetizing your trauma.
Wearing tiny wired glasses they insist are strictly for "aesthetic accuracy," Gleamington holds all the tea and at least five secrets about your ex. Their amethyst crown radiates intuitive insight, while their banded base is grounded in enough academic snark to power an occult university for a century.
They have a habit of muttering crystal puns under their breath and have been caught reciting spells backward just to “see what happens.” They claim it’s research. You didn’t ask.
Ideal Home: Somewhere with chaotic energy but decent lighting. Must love books, whispers in the dark, and possibly being corrected on your Latin pronunciation. Bonus if you have a dedicated “charging shelf” that also holds bones and bad decisions.
✨ Metaphysical Perks:
Third Eye support that’s sassy but effective
Emotional clarity via passive-aggressive silence
May amplify intuition... or just your inner monologue
🖤 Claim them before they reorganize your chakras alphabetically.
